Torino defender Leandro Castan has shed light on his spell out of football, which saw the Brazilian “lose nearly 15kg” and “convinced” him that he would die.
Speaking to La Repubblica on Friday, Castan explained how his belief that he was “one of the five best defenders in Serie A” was cruelly replaced by a fear of death after he developed a cavernoma in his brain, prompting him to undergo surgery and spend the next two years recovering.
Torino defender Leandro Castan has shed light on his spell out of football, which saw the Brazilian “lose nearly 15kg” and “convinced” him that he would die.
Speaking to La Repubblica on Friday, Castan explained how his belief that he was “one of the five best defenders in Serie A” was cruelly replaced by a fear of death after he developed a cavernoma in his brain, prompting him to undergo surgery and spend the next two years recovering.
“I was one of the five best defenders in Serie A, then suddenly I became an ex-player with the fear of dying,” the Roma loanee told La Repubblica.
“It was September 13, 2014, we were playing at Empoli, I got dizzy and I felt sick. I was replaced. In the weeks that followed, things got worse: I could barely stand up.
“In agreement with Roma, we spoke about muscle ailments, but I was terrified: I lost nearly 15kg and was convinced that I’d die.
“The same morning that I talked to my wife, I discovered that she was pregnant with our daughter.
“The doctor said that without surgery I could no longer play, but I just wanted to drop everything and go back to Brazil.
“I was confused and took a week to think about it. In the end, I agreed to undergo the surgery so I could go back to playing.
“I remember the terror in the hospital, the night before the operation. Upon waking up, I felt everything but couldn’t move.
“My wife was there, by my side. Those two days in intensive care were the hardest of my life.
“It was repeated to me that the operation was successful, but I wondered if I would really go back to normal. Now that it’s over, I have a new understanding of life.
“It wasn’t easy to come back. After I overcame the fear of dying, I wanted to prove that I could still play, but when I returned to training, I regularly skipped it. It was frustrating.
“In fact, I needed time and, above all, faith like the one I found here in Turin.
“This team have something special, everyone here wants to qualify for Europe. I’d stay as a Granata for a long time, just because they believed in me.
“I don’t want to start controversy about Sampdoria, it was a strange time, but in the end it was for the best, getting here.”